“We are products of our past, but we don’t have to be prisoners of it.”
We believe we are products of our circumstances. While some seem to attain the heights others only dream of, others seem to be in a constant state of despair and dissatisfaction. Yeah, I am not wrong. I used to procrastinate and pass blame to whoever and whatever I could.
Most of the times, the blame game directs you to your past where a slurry of wrong decisions makes for some of your worst nightmares.
“Maybe, if I would have prepared more ardently for my career, I won’t be stuck at this dead end job for the rest of my life.”
“Maybe, if I had focused on my diet and workouts 5 years back, I wouldn’t be morbidly obese.”
“Maybe, if I had confessed my love to her 5 years back, I would be her husband today instead of that guy.
“Maybe, if I had the maturity I have now and put it into my work 20 years back, things would have been different.”
I could go on and on, but the point is clear. It is our flawed human nature and years of misguided conditioning that makes us hinge on to our past like it is some permanent body in real time that governs our decision-making. The truth, however, is starkly different!
Circumstances are temporary, in fact, even your existence is
Yes, you are a result of the choices you make. But, it is these choices that create your circumstances. It is a confounding helix of ripple effects, with one little detail influencing another one even if they are millions of timelines apart.
It is important to realize that while the past is important, it does not govern your present and future. Actually, it is your decision to blame everything on it that does the job of making your life miserable in the present and the foreseeable future.
Consider the natural workings of the Universe for a moment. If we correlate ourselves to the immense expanse of the cosmos we live in, it becomes increasingly apparent that we cannot control anything apart from our choices, even our existence.
Time is a river
You might be thinking that these are musings of a philosophical lunatic. However, time indeed is a concept that we have failed to grasp. People like Einstein, Tesla, and other scientific communities understood the fact that quantifying time like we have today is blatantly wrong.
Our time measurements are fundamentally based on the principle of sight. Even a second is defined in terms of the distance traveled by a beam of light. Most of us know it takes light 8 minutes to reach Earth from the Sun.
In scientific terms, it means that you always look at the sun, 8 minutes in the past. Every time you look at the night sky, you actually stare at the past, millions of years into it.
The educational indoctrinations of the world have dumbed us down to the extent that we don’t realize that we are irrevocably interconnected with the same universal ecosystem.
Yes, the past present and future are correlated. One follows the other and cannot exist without the other.
What you do today affects both your past and future
Imagine this scenario:
A father and son have an estranged relationship for the past 25 years. Over time, they have accepted the equation, with their regrets, sentiments, and rationalities.
The father is too embarrassed to approach the son because of his actions. The son is too hurt to reach out to the father because of his broken childhood and what not.
Both can have regretful “Maybe” and “If I could” scenarios for the rest of their lives, but then something strange happens in the present. The son meets a girl and eventually marries her.
The girl is emotionally mature and understands the stories laid out by her husband. Instead of giving into hate and sticking with the status quos, she makes a choice to make amends.
She slowly guides her husband into understanding his past and that too of his father. She understands how perception creates victims and villains out of the same people.
However, she does not know the future, and She doesn’t have a clue whether her efforts will bear fruit and bring the father and son closer. All she can do is make attempts and never give up.
She is logical, mature and emotional. She understands that what matters is giving it a try.
In the time to come, let’s say after 4-5 years, the son slowly begins to understand. No, he has not forgotten that he is hurt, he has not let his emotions go, but he finally makes a choice to have a talk.
The father and son have a discussion. Both have matured over time, realized the numerous variables that dictated them in the past and how unimportant they were. They don’t instantly connect but over time, they diminish their differences and know real peace.
The crux of the above example is that the moment you decide to take action on something like the girl did or the boy later did, you don’t just affect your future, you remake your past.
It is your current choice that will allow you to justify your past and shape your future. It is a process and not a one-time event. You may make a choice to start a business today, but it won’t become a success tomorrow. The same goes for every actionable deed in this entire universe.
Stars die so that more stars, planets, and moons can be born. However, they can’t control their existence. They can just keep burning their nuclear cores. That is their purpose.
Trees don’t hinge on the past. They grow throughout life. They stick to their purpose of cleansing the air and don’t have control over their existence
Even the Sun that powers all life on Earth, will eventually fade into oblivion.
Therefore, realize the power your choices have over your circumstances. Only your choices create purpose, and it is the purpose that remains constant across your past, present and future. Life may seem to have you down on the ropes today, but you can change it by one simple choice.
Of course, it matters how true you stay your choice and purpose. But, that’s for later. As of now, this is one the best self-learned messages I can give you.
Don’t hinge on your past. Don’t try to control you present and don’t try to design your future. Make determined choices; create a purpose of your existence. That’s all that will stay!